Tuesday, January 13, 2015

The 2015 Fabrications: The Secret of Dotting the 'i"

The shocking reveal of the sousaphone player who dots the "i" in the Ohio State marching band.

The Background:
A tradition at Ohio State University since 1936, the college marching band spells out "Ohio" in script lettering and the sousaphone player dots the "i." The tradition states that it is normally a fourth or fifth year senior who receives the honor. There have been reports of a few honorary "i" dotters however, including such figures as John Glenn, Bob Hope, and Jack Nicholas.
The truth of this tradition is actually a much more elaborate story. In 1936, the Ohio State marching band and the school's drama department shared the same dressing space. As a prank, someone took one of the masks from the drama club's prop room and proceeded to dot the "i" with some extra flourish. The rowdy, and most likely drunk, student body cheered widely at this display, and thus the tradition was born.
Now, every time the "i" is dotted in the Script Ohio, another mask is taken from the drama club's stash and used.
Up until now, it was assumed that the person behind the mask was a fourth or fifth year senior sousaphone player in the band. However, our crack investigative team of four young detectives (and their dog) have discovered that the infamous "i" dotter has been the same person for the past 78 years. And that person, hiding behind so many masks is none other than ... Mr. Williger, the campus groundskeeper and head concessions salesperson.
When reached for comment, Mr. Williger made the following statement: "It was a great run. And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for those meddling kids!" Our investigative team had no comment as they sped away in their pimped out van to another assignment, with only the faint scent of Scooby snacks trailing behind them.

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